In Support of Marvel's Civil War...

Movie Review: The Da Vinci Code

As most people flocked the Gold Class for this much-awaited film, I think most of them were expecting a bed scene involving Mary Magdalene! So everyone probably went home saying it's all so boring. All kidding aside, I'd give this film 3.5 out of 5 stars. And with that out of the way, let's get down to the essence of it.

The movie was a very good adaptation of the book. Remember that word: "adaptation". This must not be mistaken for the book itself, that's a purely different encounter (as I stubbornly learned eventually). So for those of you who haven't read Dan Brown's bestseller, even if you're not into reading books, do give this one a try if you want to savour the universally-famous DVC adventure. And you might as well throw in Angels And Demons for safe measure.

Going back to the silverscreen, unfortunately the entire experience for me was spent either admiring the portrayal of Langdon (although his dialogue played safe towards the whole Church conspiracy) or deciding whether that particular scene was actually in the text (thus, my mention of adaptation).

The runaway performance would have to have come from the ever versatile Sir Ian McKellen (Magneto or Gandalf?) as Sir Leigh Teabing. "Sophie" was ok, but I thought the aptly named Sophie Marceau should've played the part, as I imagined the character to be more mature than Audrey Tatou.

The plot development was swallowed by the whole Paris landscape, and although that was an integral part of the book, I thought it was slightly distracting for the pacing of the movie. I wish the initial Louvre sequence had more substance to it though. I didn't particularly like Ron Howard's somewhat sublime style on this adaptation, but I would still recommend it to anyone looking for a good mystery film.

Oh. the drama of the last scene is a fitting ending.

Finally, my question that I pose to all who have seen it and read the book as well: where's Mickey Mouse?

Something wrong with this picture...

Found posted in toilets at Orbit restaurant on the top of the Sky Tower...

Poker Face

New Idol Judge

The third NZ Idol is about to hit off, the organisers have finally found the third idol judge to complete the trio of judges. Frankie Stevens is still there. To replace Paul and Jackie, we now have Iain Stables (a ZM DJ) and, wait for it..., Megan Alatini !!!! WTF?

I mean Fiona MacDonald, yeah...she was a veteran singer, part of a band...etc... Jackie Clarke...ok. To be honest I do not know much about Jackie Clarke but I do know that she's been performing for a while and occassionally appearing at "Christmas in the Park" concerts and of course Lotto commercials. But Megan Alatini?! Yes she was part of True Bliss - acclaimed to be a platinum-sale music group. Lemme tell you something about what I learnt from the way they rate music sales...I was told by a former radio industry DJ that music companies record the number of WHOLESALE sales of CDs and albums and count that towards the rating (whether gold or platinum, etc). What's wrong with it? What if the music shops don't actually sell the whole lot that was purchased? What if they were sold for 75% off a month later? What if they were given away as promos? I do not think that counts, does it?

Another thing, True Bliss was a one-hit wonder (if you can call them a hit just like Hear say - who?) As a judge, I do not think Megan Alatini is right for the job. I am willing to bet she will use the phrase "You made it your own." which seems to be the trademark phrase of NZ Idol. If they are going to choose a former True Bliss member, then it should be Carly Binding 9who's had several pretty good hits) or, if they have to, Joe Cotton who until still has a band called Mermaids.

I suppose NZ doesn't have many music talents they can use and any talent that do pop up tend to go overseas.

Some comments from idol fans: http://www.idolblog.com/node/2008053

Movie Review: Mission Impossible III

What can I say? MI3 didn't give me the 'oohs' and aahs' at first. Part of the reason is that Ethan Hunt is now retired (in the beginning at least) and his life is somewhat normal. But Ethan Hunt is not suppose to be normal. An IMF agent is very skilled. Perhaps even more than MI6 agents. They are suppose to be ghosts - master of disguises that can fool even spouses. They are daredevils, jumping off choppers into tight spaces. So to fix this terrible fact in the beginning of the movie, they showed a very emotional scene from the middle (of the movie) where he was captured by his enemy. Now you got my attention!

After retiring and with wedding plans, he was force to carry out one final mission to rescue his student, agent Ferris played by Keri Russell captured by the enemy. Russell was quite impressive in this action movie and I predict this to be one of maybe a couple more action films for her. She handles herself very well as a serious female action star - good with guns and tumbling around, etc...

The mystery of the IMF office was bared open in this movie. In previous MI films, it felt like agents are somewhat nomadic meeting in strange places receiving self-destructing message devices with (big) central command like the FBIs do.

The bad guy (Owen Davian), played by Philip Hoffman, is Hunt's ultimate nemesis. His evil twin. His is strong, and ruthless. Unlike any MI bad guy before. All the previous ones are motivated by money. At the end of the day, it is about stealing something and selling it for money. Davian is very personal.

What about the action? I felt that I've seen all the action sequences before. For example the famous hanging from the ceiling only a couple of inches from the floor; they seem to have repeated this too many times. At least they didn't dwell too much on the scenes.

The story was a lot more personal. It was about Hunt and not about saving the world. In the first one the main item of interest was the Noc list. In the second it was the Chimera. Both these can have big consequences either to the whole world or to the agency if it got out "in the open". For MI3, it was the Rabbit's Foot. The movie didn't really explain what it does. It is as "biohazard" but what can it do? The story is too personal to explain what the Rabbit's Foot actually is. It was as though the whole movie was one big rescue mission.
Nevertheless, you still get that edge of the seat feel. The tricks they do are still nerve racking. The weapons are still cool (somewhat) - I really like the explosive implants. The movie didn't have a draggy beginning. Action is scattered all throughout. Overall, it is enjoyable and it does have a good twist at the end.

I would rate this...8.5 out of 10

Auckland transport

Petrol prices have gone up so much now where I use to spend about $16 per week on my motorbike to now a full tank costs me $24. So I decided to start carpooling whenever I can. Yesterday was one of them.

What I’ve noticedFirst of all, it is terrible driving to the city every morning. The traffic is very bad and what normally takes 15 -20 minutes (normal speed) to get to town now takes more than an hour sometimes during rush hour.

What is to blameWell on the motorway I noticed plenty of cars with no passengers. We are talking about sedans, SUVs and vans with only one person (the driver) in it. I looked at all the cars surrounding the car I was in and out of the 8 cars around me, only one have a passenger.

Public TransportI would use public transport if it is more reliable and easy to take. In fact I take the bus from Newmarket (where I get dropped off) to my work in Westhaven. But why wouldn’t I take the bus from Henderson? The problem is, it would cost me more and it is very inconvenient. I first have to walk three blocks to the closes bus stop to take me to central Henderson. From here I can take another “flyer” straight to town for take the train to town. Either way, I get dropped off to downtown which is about 20 minutes walk from my work. So in addition to walking, say, 1.5 hours total in a day, I will also have to spend about say $8-$10 a day which totals to about $50 a week; twice that if I ride my bike. Plus there are other factors like “buses do not come on time” or “trains break down”. On my bike, I get to park in the building I work in.

Currently, I carpool once in a while to Newmarket and I take the Link from there to VPM and walk for 5-10 minutes to work. Believe it or not, this usually takes an hour and most of it from waiting for a Link bus. Yesterday when I got to Newmarket outside the Lion Breweries, I saw a Link bus. Then while I was walking to the bus stop, I saw another Link bus (i.e. within 5 minutes). When I got to the bus stop, I waited for 20 minutes in the rain for a bus. It took another 50 minutes on the bus for me to get to work.

…and government officials ask why people won’t take public transport?!

Solution?
Is there a solution? Possibly not a perfect one but there are several things that can be done to improve transport and travelling in Auckland. First of all the geography of Auckland is like an hour glass so there will always be merging of traffic into the centre of town. What must be developed is a train system that centralises at the Britomart. It should spread out in 2-3 directions south and later the outside 2 should spread west and east. The train should also spread north (2 routes) to the north and one northwest towards the beachhaven way. At the end of the terminals should be a network of bus services to go into suburbs and smaller places. There should also be a free bus (like in Melbourne) that go around town. Actually we have that here now but the route is limited and small. One of the stops is at Sky City. I occasionally use it.

Tax breaks for buying smaller cars will encourage people to buy smaller cars. i.e. less petrol consumption and easier to park in town (or everywhere).

Bus / motorcycle /carpool lanes on the motorway; there should be more of these lanes on the motorway where only active buses, motorcycles (and other 2-wheeled motorised vehicles), and cars with more than one occupant should be allowed to use. Currently motorcycles are allowed on bus lanes on normal roads. That’s good but motorcycles should be allowed on motorway bus lanes too. For one it is safer than weaving through traffic which a lot of bikers do. These type of lanes exist overseas and they work, why not here.

Lastly, Auckland residents should get out of their comfort zone and start embracing solutions like this or we will not move forward.

Hmmm...Ice Cream....

I like kitchen appliances in general and along with the whole line of Breville 800 class kitchen appliances (which includes blenders and expresso machines), I've been looking at ice cream makers and food driers. I like the 800 class because they look commerical, professional, and they are stainless steel, hargh, hargh, hargh...

One of the things I got for my bday was an ice cream maker. Very nice machine, line with shiny bits. The control on top is simple. One on/off switch and a LCD screen with a really cool blue backlight. There is something about cool blue, ain't it?

So...yesterday I made my first home made ice cream. The machine didnt quite freeze the ice cream properly but I have a feeling it was user error. I was suppose to freeze the container for at least 24 hours at -18 C. Since I was in a hurry to use it and demonstrate it, I only manage to freeze it 22 hours at normal freezer temperature (whatever that maybe).

Still, I think it is really great. You turn the machine on and pour in the mixture (which is something I've prepared earlier ;)). The machine will turn the mixture while the container freezes it. The machine turns off by itself (this model does) and I ended up with a soft serve textured ice cream. I suppose I can serve it immediately if it is to be consumed right away. After all this is gourmet ice cream.

The ice cream was yummy. The machine doesn't make it yummy of course. I spent the night before preparing the mixture and didnt go to bed till 1am.

The ice cream is pretty much set now. I'm not sure if the ingredients I used had high enough fat content because the ice cream has an almost gelato feel to it. It is quite light. All good though as it is more refreshing than normal tip tops.

What did I make? ..... My first home made ice cream happens to be "Baileys" flavoured!

With a big crash and a bang...

and an almight whoosh, I was startled awake as the thunder crashed somewhere off in the distance... followed shortly by, what seemed like, a storm-like wind which gusted for several minutes... then imagine the sound of a bucket of water being splashed forcefully against a wall... then multiply that by... well, a LOT, and you'd kinda get an idea of what it sounded like...
Then, when I walked out of the house at around 7.30, there were several large patches of what seemed, at first glance, to be snow. However, on closer inspection, it was just hail stones... a lot of hail stones... wonder what it would've looked like directly after it came down... all this, just from the tail end of summer - makes me wonder what the winter holds in store

Telecom destroys leaked evidence

I smell something fishy!

No appreciation

You bastard! Gimme your money if you don’t appreciate the whole shebang!

Master training

Just an update on Binky…Binky is now 6 months old – turning 7 in 3 weeks. I’m happy that she’s grown out of her biting and chewing habits. She still likes to bite and chew on her own toys but not people’s fingers and toes. Her hair is growing quite long and I have had to trim her twice in the past 3 months.

She’s also toilet trained now. Unless it is a real emergency, she would conduct her business outside the house. She can hold it for longer periods of time now.

There was a stage when she will bark and things like shadows and trees; especially the neighbour’s cat. Now she only still barks at the cat but she jumps more now – playing tag with the cat on top of the fence.

There is one new thing that she’s developed. She started humping about a month ago starting with Bolog3r’s leg. I hope she grows out of this one, too.

One thing she developed since the beginning was playing fetch. It started when she was still small. She had the instinct of returning a ball to you after you’ve thrown it away. Now this is very evident. She will bring a ball or one of her toys to you and wait for you to throw it. She even understands me when I tell her to bring the ball closer so I can throw it. She will obediently (most of the time) grab the ball and bring it to you within arm’s reach. She’ll do this for hours and sometimes can become annoying and tiring.

My question is, did I train her to fetch? Or did she train me to throw?

Waste of taxpayers’ money?

Saw on the breakfast news show this morning that after one year, there were only 460 gay couples who got ‘married’ after the civil union act came into effect.

That is very low compared to 21,000+ normal couples getting married.

I wonder how much tax payers’ money was spent in forming and finalising this act.

There are a couple of ‘couples’ featured on the herald today; one straight and one gay. The straight couple (Mike and Tracy Peters of Christchurch) said “they were not religious and had no desire for a traditional wedding”. If that is the case, then why don’t they simply go to a registry office and register there as a married couple? They do not need a church to get married. A lot of people get married using a celebrant and not priests in church altars. Some may argue that this Act is for protecting de facto relationships as well. If it is for de facto relationships, to give them protection, wouldn’t an amendment to the normal marriage law be good enough instead of creating a new law for gays?

Some Funny (and nakakakilabot) Pinoy Videos

Filipino Spice Girls
Filipino Backstreet Boys
Filipino Jackass
Filipino Pie
Pinoy Ako

Self infliction

Is it really?

Saw this on the Herald site, today. A banner ad for Woosh. Looks more like a future headline for the struggling ISP. Won't be surprised :)

Local news

Horse rolls on rider
 
18.04.06 7.00am
 
A woman was seriously injured when the horse she fell from rolled over on her in the Waikato yesterday afternoon. The woman, who is in her late 30s, was riding near Te Kauwhata, 19km north of Huntly, and suffered concussion and a serious head injury. The Westpac Waikato Air Ambulance took the woman to Middlemore Hospital in Auckland.


Read this on the Herald today.
Don’t you think it is a bit too local news (Waikato) for it to be in a national paper?
Next thing you’ll hear….”Cat stuck on top of tree in the township of Ngaruwahia”

Nobody puts Baby in a corner

Thanks heaps to Jiggasaurus, today I got to go and see the Dirty Dancing Stage Performance.

I sort of know what to expect of a performance like this however, I as do not recall watching the movie, I do not know the story. There were two 70-minute parts with a 20 minute intermission.

The first part was or seemed long however, it wasn't draggy as some parts of King Kong the Movie (Peter Jackson Version). It was enjoyable was lots of funny bits all throughout. The singing and dancing were all very good; I didn't spot any mistakes at all - like the ones I saw in the last Sleeping Beauty ice skating show I went to. (Don't ask about this one. I fell asleep half way). But I guess dancing on ice is a lot different.

The main actress Kym Valentine (above) was very good and entertaining. She does have that very familiar face abd as I later found out, she is Australian and appear regularly on TV, etc...

The stage and props were very good I thought. The employed a giant turntable for switching between scenes which added to the character of the show. The use of lights and projectors were very good too. It is like watching a movie in 3D almost. The way they do background pauses to focus your attention to the current dialogue was unique, or at least to me.

There were lots of kids in the show. I felt that this show was not appropriate for kids. There were lots of "Dirty Dancing", a few bed scenes, talk about sex, and swearing even. I am very surprised kids were allowed in (some looked as young as 8yo) and even more surprised parents would bring their kids.

The second half of the show went pretty fast. It was resolution after resolution and BAM! It was the end. Maybe the second half was more enjoyable than the first?...

The final scene was quite lively with everyone in the theatre swaying and clapping away. There is one I didn't quite get and that was the signature line "Nobody puts baby in the corner". I just don't get it...cheesy and meaningless I thought. It is not like "You can't handle the truth!" from "A Fed Good Men" or "Live Long and Prosper" from "Star Trek". But everyone seem to know it and applauded when the line was executed. Those are probably those women who watch the movie over and over again and use the remote to rewind that scene over and over and over...

After the grand finale (and several signature poses), Kym yelled and ask everyone in the audience to dance. Only some people at the front row stood up and perhaps a dozen around us. There was this annoying wiggling hippo in front of me. I had to move my head two seats to the left to see the stage again.

Overall, it was a good show. Jiggasaurus rated it 7/10 compared to 9/10 for Mamma Mia. I did not see Mamma Mia but I would rate this 7-8/10. And I did not fall asleep!

Jiggasaurus, feel free to add a few comments since you very very seldom post entries. :)

Would I recommend it? I'd say yes especially if you are into theatre stuff.

Finally, I thought it only happens in the Philippines but who the heck would nick name their daughters "Baby"?!?!

Bloody hell...

Just came back from the airport to see off my brother. He, his fiancee and future mother-in-law are going to the Philippines to get the wedding stuff... He's the first out of us brothers (that were born in the Philippines) to go back to the Philippines after nearly 20 years of never been back :-) his fiancee has, of course, been back to the Philippines several times since they immigrated to NZ...

So they'll be spending 8 days in Manila, during which he'll be going to meet the rest of his fiancee's relatives, which would be rather interesting as my brother can primarily only understand bisaya... Oh, that and the fact that his way of trying to brush-up on his tagalog has been to spend the past couple of months watching several filo movies :-)
Then after Manila, they are off to cebu for another 11 days (or thereabouts) where the roles are reversed since his fiancee can't speak bisaya :-)

So when I came back to work, I decided to walk to the supermarket, which is about 100 meters away... The heavens suddenly opened up with big fat heavy raindrops... To cut a long story short, I had to gap it back to work and now I'm sitting here in my pink (it's pink damnit, not salmon) rather soaked, waiting for the aircon to do it's thing... I've toyed with the idea of using the hand-dryers in the toilets (a la Mr. Bean), but since our toilets are unisex, it'd look kinda weird me standing there trying myself off with the hot air like that...

*sigh* another day in the life of me...

Today's Blonde Joke

A young blonde was on vacation and driving through the Everglades. She wanted to take home a pair of genuine alligator shoes in the worst way, but was very reluctant to pay the high prices the local vendors were asking.

After becoming very frustrated with the "no haggle on prices" attitude of one of the shopkeepers, the blonde shouted, "Well then, maybe I'll just go out and catch my own alligator, so I Can get a pair of shoes for free!" The shopkeeper said with a sly, knowing smile, "Little lady, just go and give it a try!" The blonde headed out toward the swamps, determined to catch an alligator.

Later in the day, as the shopkeeper is driving home, he pulls over to the side of the levee where he spots that same young woman standing waist deep in the murky bayou water, shotgun in hand. Just then, he spots a huge 9-foot gator swimming rapidly toward her. With lightning speed, she takes aim, kills the creature and hauls it onto the slimy bank of the swamp. Lying nearby were 7 more of the dead creatures, all lying on their backs.

The shopkeeper stood on the bank, watching in silent amazement. The blonde struggled and flipped the gator onto its back. Rolling her eyes heavenward and screaming in great frustration, she shouts out "THIS ONE'S BAREFOOT TOO!"

Sex games

Kinda like the Sims with mods?

Evening at the Awards

The NetGuide Web Awards night was held last night at the Hilton. It was a great night as always. I was at the door collecting tickets so I got to see most of the guests that came.

The first one was this woman from Orcon Internet she was 15 minutes early. But most people came on time starting at 5.30pm. I couldn’t really remember everyone as the whole time I was collecting tickets seem to have gone pass like a blur – except for one. Around 6pm I saw the Jay-Jay and Dom party coming in the sliding door. I said “Hello! How are you?” to Jay-Jay and her response was “Big shoes, small steps!” then everyone had a laugh and she tip toed her way up the stairs. *sigh* What some women would do in the name of glamour…oh for those who do not know the couple, they are 2/3 of the Morning Madhouse on the Edge radio station. Check out Jay-Jay’s site.

Around 6.30pm I proceeded upstairs and found myself a seat at the back of the second column along with other ACP Media staff. The theatre was packed…well there were about half a dozen empty seats at the back of the last column but that is due to the pricks who refuse to sit and are standing beside the toilet doors.

MC was Kerre Woodham. As always she is a great MC and speaker. Very funny, entertaining and can read the crowd very well. She did the intros etc then it was time for Sam Morgan to speak.

Well his speech was inspiring. But nothing you haven’t heard before such as how he started TradeMe on a laptop in his garage, etc…He did admit that he ripped off the member rating system off EBay (. Overall it was quite good. He is not a speaker so at the end of his speech he struggled a bit and lost his chain of thought. But who cares, we get the idea…

On with presenting the awards: all the winners are listed here. A couple of funny things that happened…There is the category “Best hi-speed Internet site” which is about web sites with content for broadband. While the finalists were being read out, there were some booing from the crowd when Xtra was mentioned but of course the winner was Xtramsn. So the format is, the winner comes up on stage; accepts his award (plaque); and say a few words. This guy from Xtra came up and one of the things he said was “We at Xtra love broadband…” then someone from the crowd yelled out “WE love broadband too!” Everybody laughed and the Xtra guy was so pissed off that he walked off the stage. Of course Kerre jokingly told off the mean people…hehehehe Another funny one, Best ISP which was won by Ihug. The Ihug guy came up and said “I would like to thank all other ISPs for running shithouses!” The rest of the speeches had some hostility in them and it seemed to be the speech theme of the night.

After the awards, food was served. Food were great. We had salmon, chicken satay, and lamb cutlets! I also had artichokes – yum yum. We’ll have some photos in the above site soon!

Busy

I haven’t forgotten…been very busy for the past few weeks and more so this week. Especially now that I’ve been given another responsibility in the wrong direction…

Our Australian counterpart decided to drop the complimentary CD  that goes out with the mag each month which is identical to the CD for NZ. And since Australia produces the CD, the responsibility of making the CD is now on my plate.

I don’t mind learning new things but there is nothing new to learn from this. It is a huge time waster for me. The CD is a simple data cd where every month I have to put together the content and installer files and create a master CD or ISO which I then have to send (back) to Australia for pressing.

I can’t really complain much and if I refuse to do this, it will disrupt the production cycle, etc.

Anyway tonight I have the Web Awards event to go to. As always, I’ve been given the job of collecting tickets and greeting guests. Our speaker tonight is Sam Morgan – looking forward to listen to him talk.

Too PC?

I recently rented the NZ TV series “Mataku” which are supernatural stories based on Maori beliefs and legends. It is quite interesting although production and consistency is quite poor. Very low budget I suppose…

In a way I view this series as very racist as they do not portray the normal picture of the NZ population. Everyone is Maori with the exception of Michael Hurst as one of the guest star in one episode.

One example was this episode where a woman nearly died and was in the hospital. There was a scene inside the hospital and everyone was Maori. There were no white people, no pacific island people, and no Asian people. If you go to any hospital here in Auckland (which is the city where the episode was set); you will find all of the above.

There is one big inconsistency, one which I am very upset about. In the same episode (I think it was called “The pathway of the spirits”) there was a scene where this man was driving on a rural highway at night. The highway was meant to be some rural road that leads to Cape Reinga where the spirits travel towards the land of the afterlife (I forgot what this is called). On the side of the road is a police car with a cop inside drinking coffee. After the man drove pass the cop speeding, the cop gave chase.

What is wrong with the above scene? Two major things…first the cop was on the side of the road drinking coffee - cops do not drink coffee on the side of the road!!! Whenever you see them, they are pointing some sort of laser gun at oncoming cars. Second, this is a rural area! Cops don’t stay on the side of the road waiting for speedsters without a laser; they stay at motorways where their revenue-gathering quotas can be filled much faster!

Blogger for Word

I’ve recently discovered an add-in for Microsoft Word called “Blogger for Word”. In fact I’m posting this one using my Microsoft Word. If you see this then I would safely say that it works (

It adds a toolbar on your Word software that looks like this:

(image placeholder)

Again…if you see the image above then posting images to your blog through Word works, too.

The Blogger Settings is where you add you login details. Open Post allow you to edit previous posts (even the ones already online) and I think the remaining two is pretty much self explanatory.

I’ve saved this file as “Blogger for Word” thinking that it might be taken as the subject of this posting but the add-in prompts you for the title anyway.

Here it goes….Publish….

I just got a message that images are not supported....sigh..That's ok..maybe soon...

Anyone notice?!?

How more and more ATMs are dispensing $50 bills instead of $20s? It's so bl00dy annoying! Every couple of weeks or so, I withdraw about $100 for general expenses and situations where I can't use the credit card (55 days interest free AND you get rewards points? You'd be silly not to take advantage of it ^_^)

But yeah, where was i? right, $50 bills... I don't like carrying around bills of that denomination due to the fact that some shopkeepers really hate trying to break bills that size - especially when you're just after a drink which costs $2... Why oh why did they (the banks) have to change? Is it just another sign of how things are getting more and more expensive? Or is this an indication that they will also be doing away with other denominations of coins/bills...

If they're going to change the ATMs, at least they should have implemented a step where you can choose what denominations you would like the cash to be dispensed in... It isn't that hard and I'm sure that there are off the shelf solutions that other banks have already developed to address this, imho, issue...

Or am I just being a picky consumer...

Too much haka?

Apparently the Aussies are complaining about the Kiwi Swimming team performing too many hakas. Personally I can see both sides of the story. You have on one side the Kiwis celebrating the medal win but then it is only bronze so why perform the haka. True it is still a win to be on the top three but as a Kiwi I do agree with the Aussies and feel the Haka is being devalued. Gold, yes do the haka....silver and bronze...don't bother...maybe do some chant of some kind instead.

 

Also, how does the Maori in NZ feel about this use (or overuse) or Haka? Even the Maoris, you don't see them do it every day. I think you lose the power or the haka if you do.

 

Remember not so long ago there was a question regarding the government performing powhiris every time some government official comes to NZ? Similar situation I guess...

 

Performing the haka even if the medal won is not gold, will make it appear as if the Kiwi expectations on perfomance are too low. You know...kinda like "Tha'll do, pig...tha'll do."

Consistency?

We have this page on our site where all the competitions are and the folder is appropriately named "competitions".

 

However, in the interest of shortening this address and making it easier to remember, the address  I create a folder named "win" with a redirection to the first folder and this is printed in the magazine.

 

It's been running like that for years and suddenly just now, I got this demanding question from "Bastard" as if he is the know-it-all person..."Isn't it time we mvoe the competitions pages to the win folder? It will be more consitent."

 

I asked "consistent with what? Does it matter? People type www.url.co.nz/win and they still end up at the competitions page."

 

He said "well if people type the first address and end up in the second address, it is not consistent. Yes it does matter."

 

Of course I can hear his tone of voice that he is not backing off...so I said fine...I'll move it next time I work on it.

  

The question is, Does it really matter? I have lots of short cuts on my site. As a user of any site, does it really matter if the final address is not what you typed? I mean what if the address is www.url.co.nz/supercalifragislicexpialidocious. Surely you would want a short cut for that address...

 

Zoolander

I did a bit of a Zoolander yesterday and went to a men's grooming/spa centre called Mensworks. I had a massage and a facial.

Actually I got there 15 minutes late but it doesn't matter. I already booked the room and so it was still free when I got there.

This was the first time I've gone for a massage here in NZ. The previous times were when I was in Bali for my honeymoon. Balinese massage in Bali was fairly cheap so I had at least 3 while I was there.

So got to Mensworks in Little High Street. The centre is inside through a mens clothing store. Got there and there were these two girls at the counter. The brunette ask me "Can I help you?". I said "Yes, name is Henson and I have a 10.30 booking...sorry I'm late". She said "No problem, we'll just take you straight through". The blonde left the counter. Thinking she was the "massage techinician", I turned and followed her but I stopped thinking maybe she's not...she turned around and said "follow me..."

So we proceeded to this room. She explained that because I was late that we can only have 45 mins of massage and 30 mins facial. She asked what body parts would you liked massaged. I didn't know what to say...don't they normally do full body? Never been to one here so I do not know how it works. She explained that I can have a back massage and perhaps the back of my legs. Thinking that the massage is more important than the facial, I said what if I just have a full hour of massage (so she can do the whole treatment) then I'll come back for a facial some other time. She agreed then asked me to stripped down to my underwear and lie down under the brown towel.

I wonder why the towels were brown. To hide dark stains perhaps or maybe it is just more manly than having white towels which presumably other spas have that are primary designed for women. Well I felt kinda weird because I got nothing on but my underwear and if she suddenly opens the door, everyone outside in the "salon" area would see me...so I quickly hid under the towel and stayed there feeling a bit silly...a couple of minutes later there was a knock, she came in...

While I was lying on the massage table, I changed my mind about the the full hour massage and said that I will have the 45 min swedish massage and 30 min facial. She does not have a problem with it...I guess she is prepared for everything in the massage room...to my right is a steamer for towels and a pot of magenta-coloured wax. Beside me is a floor standing face steam sauna device. Towards my head was a trolley which later I found to have rows of face products like cleansers and lotions.

Ok...she turned the CD player on...some soothing music and started...I felt a bit naked in front of a stranger but I guess I have the towel to cover me...she told me to turn around and face down while she lifted the towel...I thought "Hey, this looks familiar...I'm sure I've seen something like this on TV or in the movies before...". In case you arfe wondering...in Bali I wore shorts so I didn't feel as naked. She put the towel back on and I was getting comfortable until I felt that my underwear was being pulled ... she was folding the towel in with my briefs and pulled it a quarter way down...I never wore my jeans low so you can imagine how naked my butt crack felt. I started hearing some sloppy noises then felt her hands just above my butt cheeks.

The swedish massage, or at least her style, is not as hard as I thought. I thought it would be more painful. I did feel some tension but that soon disappeared. She also massaged the back of my legs which I always enjoy...(when I was younger my nanny massaged my arms and legs some nights before I go to sleep. It help relax me). After my legs, she also massaged the sole of my feet which I must say was very soothing. I've never had a feet massage like that before. Feet massages always focus on the top of the feet and not the sole...I'ma bit ticklish so I was trying quite hard not to move and giggle...actually the room was very quiet apart from the background music.

After the back massage she asked me to turn over again and its time for a facial...I always feel uneasy with facials as I do not like sloppy, greasy lotions on my face...facial treatment lotions are usually greasy...but since I'm already there...I ignored this greasiness and enjoyed the facial treatment. It was very relaxing to the face. It fact I kind of fell half asleep specially while I had the mask on and I was getting a scalp massage.

Oh before I forget...she asked me..."would you like me to tidy your eye brows". I thought sure...can't be that bad...she started doing something to my eye brows...it was warm so I thought she had a special tool. I did not feel any pain and in my mind I thought...yup this is ok...she paused for a moment then suddenly...."ZHIP!" .... yes she just waxed my eye brows...I can only imagine women waxing facial hair above the lip (using nads AS SEEN ON TV!) It must hurt a lot more.

Over all it was very relaxing... my face felt a bit more relaxed after the pain...weird...

After the treatment this is my conclusion and advice to all of you...every now and then it is definitely worth getting a massage. Facial...maybe for some of us who are a bit more Metrosexual. And if you do get a massage, the longer the better.

My brows look like this now...

Baby Hedgehogs

Gluttony

Haven't eaten much meat for the whole week last week (except for the 2 lamb shanks I had at the Sky City casino...special at $4.95 between 2-6pm)...so I managed to finish slow cooking the lamb shanks I purchased yesterday. I have not finished them yet. They are sitting in the fridge but seeing as I have today to cook, I decided (pre-planned from yesterday actually) to cook another lot of stewed beef with carrots (surprise, surprise). I may hate carrots from now on...

I decided to be slightly different this time. I added carrots, a small stick of celery and some sliced tomatoes and ginger to the beef stew. The ginger will usually calm any strong smell down...not that I mind beef smell. Actually I love beef smell such as the smell you get from Beef Brisket...anyway, I added the ginger for my wife's benefit. She doesn't like beef smell so by masking/neutralising it with ginger, she might think it is a variety of brown chicken.

This was a very simple dish, and I usually add too many spices that the real taste of the meat disappears. This was around lunch time after I had my lamb shank lunch. I left it cooking in the crockpot (kind of a lazy way of cooking but effective). Went to visit my parents then came back home and fell asleep. Unless I'm really tired, I cannot have deep sleeps in the afternoons especially if there was constant barking and 50 cent in the background. Later I found what caused this constant barking...the neighbour accidentally kicked their ball into my backyard. "Come on Phillipe, kickze ball like I told you..." My dog has never seen a rugby ball so she thought it was an alien from outer space and constantly barked at it until she got tired and bored. No doubt my neighbours watched her bark at it for ages unable to do anything from a distance.

Woke up and felt hungry so I went to look at the food I was slowly cooking the whole afternoon. I was very surprised by the finished product. The tomato added a hint of spiciness to the taste and the celery's done something to the aroma...this certainly encourages me to try simpler ingredients when cooking in the future...

Going back to the real topic of this entry...As the food I cooked was very appetising...I ate too much. I always do this to myself...My tummy hurts now..had to go to the bathroom 3 times in the past 2 hours. Hopefully its gone by tomorrow morning or I'll have to call in sick.

My tummy is quite sensitive yet I never learn my lesson. Because I don't get to eat beef often, I somehow eat heaps if I do get the chance.

I'm also lactose intolerant yet I love dairy food like milk, cheese, ICE CREAM!... I usually try subtitutes like soy milk (which I also love) and a little cheese. But eventually I developed some sort of intolerance to soy milk too...not sure why... No matter, I can drink more soy milk than normal milk. Ice Cream I like very much. Usually go for Vanilla or Cookies n Cream. No chocolate but will eat it if I have no choice.

Oh yes...I did eat ice cream this afternoon...could have contributed to my sore tummy...

Groceries

I went food shopping today...actually lemme start at the beginning.

Pogz's log 11th March, 2006. This morning I did my usual saturday chore of giving my dog a bath. Nothing special except I've realised how much she's grown. I had to use a lot more shampoo now to make sure I have enough suds to clean her fur.

After that I took Jessica in for a service. It is different for a bike. Because the engine is smaller and more delicate, a bike needs to be serviced every 6,000 km (compared to 10,000 to a car). I found this jacket on sale except I am not comfortable in this jacket. But then again I am not sure how a leather riding jacket should fit. I was quite tempted to get it and tried it on at least 3 times and kept in on for a while hoping it would stretch. In the end I eneded up not getting it.

Came home a few hours later and did my other chores like vacuuming the carpet. I also did the laundry and washed all the tiled floors. Which reminds me, I need to get one of those good mops...

Went to do some grocery shopping...didn't buy much but I was hungry for meat. For the whole week I hardly had anything else but carrots and pumpkin. Due to a sudden change in plans, my mother-in-law had to get rid of them so I took them in to care for them in my tummy. So a got lots of meat like lamb and beef...In fact I'm cooking some lamb shanks right now in the slow cooker.

At the supermarket, I also bought 8 bottles of coke. I got 8 because that is the limit for today's special. When I got to the counters, I saw one which was virtually free. So I strolled towards this counter and the cashier saw me...as I approached the girl said, "Excuse me, 12 items or less only". I told her I have 8 bottles of coke which you can scan as one item times 8...she ask how many other items I have and I said "...uumm...9.." - which was true. So really she will only be scanning 10 items and this cleary falls under the "12 items or less" requirement. I asked if it was ok and she say "yes..."

I just thought I'd mention this because is this rule really strict? She wasn't really smiling while serving me so perhaps she was having a bad day..? There was no one behind me and by the time someone queued behind me I was outta there as if I really had 12 items or less.

It's dinner time now...I thought of having a "Rookworst" for dinner. I've always like these sausages. Any european sausage with "worst" at the end of its name, I am willing to try. The instructions say...

To cook: Simmer for 20 mins (dp not boil) or microwave in bag for approx 1.5
mins.

Seeing as I am quite hungry, I decided I'd follow the nuke procedure. I was about to put the bag in the microwave oven when I noticed this silvery bit at the end of the sausage...they are pieces of metal that hold the ends shut! WTF? Am I suppose to microwave this with the metal? It did say "...microwave in bag..." What if I didn't see it? I would have caused some explosions! Didn't the sausage maker "Verkerks" think of that?

Anyway that reminded me of creating a blog entry for today so I wrote this entry before having dinner ... and now I'm really really hungry...

Bored at home? Create your own zoo...

Its official: Windows XP boots on MacBook Pro

Ever feel...

Ever feel that there's not enough hours in the day to keep up to date with everything new?

Here's a way to keep *ahem* on top of things :-)

Purpose of being here

This morning, like many mornings, I woke up from a strange dream. Like many others, I usually forget about this dream in 10 minutes. During this period, my mind switches from the dream world to the real world...first question that pops into my head (apart from thinking I need to pee or I need to let the dog out) is usually What am I doing here? What is my purpose?

 

Is there something else I need to be doing? Is there somewhere else I needed to be? Perhaps helping out in wildlife conservation programs in africa or maybe enlisting in the military. Perhaps I should be living in a different country. I think about this most of the time even while commuting on the way to work. At work is where reality's reality sets in...I stop thinking about it. There's work to do...

 

 

Empty Road

Yesterday B0log3r, REM, and I wne to the Xbox 360 Road Trip. This event first started requiring people to pre-register and this "VIP priority list" is suppose to have first access inside the bus. Here is the disclaimer...

Registering will give you priority access inside the bus over others who have not registered, however, registration will not guarantee you access inside the bus. Access is subject to availability of the bus on the day and numbers are limited. Microsoft reserves the right to close off registrations at any time. Please note the final admission to the bus each day is at 8.45 PM. The bus will hold 40 people at a time and each session on the bus will last for 15 min. You must register at least 1 day prior to the day you wish to attend the Roadtrip.

Good if there was plenty of people however, this was not the case on the day. We got there around 2-3pm and there was hardly any people queuing up.

The bus was impressive. They converted the outside of the bus to look roundish. The left hand side bus panel had 10 or so plasma screens on it. Problem is, you can't see anything on the screen because it is facing directly at the sun. Having the event during the daytime, you would have thought they are smart enough to turn the bus so the screen faces south or away from the sun.

When we got there, there was about a dozen cars parked around the bus. Most of it probably belong to the staff of Microsoft and Noel Leemings. Yes Noel Leemings staff was there giving away some paper with special discount offers when you pre-order your console pack. The offer includes discounts to games for the whole year and quadruple FlyBuys points.

>> Here's the side of the bus...yes there is something showing on the screens. Spot the Noel Leemings guy :)

We waited for about 10 minutes as they prepare the inside of the bus. Not sure why it wasn't prepared in the first place if the even ran from 9am-9pm. Perhaps they have BSOD problems and had to reboot.

To the right of the queue are two cars with plasma screens and Xbox 360s. This is where the non-VIP people is suppose to view the new consoles while they wait for access inside the bus. Of course as you can see, this doesn't matter. You can fit everyone waiting outside inside the bus. They said you can fit up to 40 people inside the bus. Well maybe when seated in seats. There are about 20 displays inside. So theoretically, you can have 40 players at any one time plus spectators.

Problem is (see above), there is hardly enough room to fit two people per display to fit anyone older than 11 yrs old and the games they feature above are all R16! What the?! Each display uses an LCD screen which was impressive.

The consoles are cased inside a clear plastic display with no venting so behind each display is an exhaust fan (above) to vent all the hot air out of the xbox units. Also inside the bus is 19 degrees C as indicated in the A/C controls. It was very cold. The three of us had to leave at least twice to warm ourselves up. We concluded that the A/C was not for the comfort of the visitors but to prevent the xbox 360 from overheating - one of the faults discovered so far by xbox 360 users overseas.

At the back of the bus there is in very impressive screen showing some video. The video was very pixelated :)

The reflection on the screen features a silhouette of ... how did they put it... the "sizzling Joanna Dark". Trust me...nothing sizzling there...We were all frozen. In fact, This guy chatting to her is one of the staff. Everyone was more focussed on playing the games. There was one time I saw "Dark" sitting in front of the bus reading Brass magazine.

What games did we play? Well there was Perfect Dark Zero which was quite good - controls take a bit of getting use to. There was also Quake 4 (ok), DOA 4 (ok - ernie would enjoy), Project Gotham 3 (nothing new), NFS MW, Kameo, Call of Duty 2, Fight Night, Some skateboard game, and a soccer game. The bus would have been a disappointment to kids as there are only 4 games for them to see.

Not everything is a disappointment though. They were giving away lanyards, caps (which looked gay), rubber bands, and tennis bands.

Anything free can brighten up your day. :)))

We stayed for a couple of hours. Got bored and my back was aching. The displays were not ergonomic. We also got real cold.

Overall, it was an ok but sub-standard experience. Wich they would give away more things like FREE XBOX 360s!!!!

I spoke to one of the staff and The turn out on friday wasn't so big. I was told they attracted about 200 people on friday at the domain. Well what do you expect I guess...parents are working and children are in school. When they get there, they'll find that most of the bus is R16 anyway.

I'll leave the rest of the comments to B0log3r if he's got any.

Bushisms - More than words

It can only happen to George W! To make a fool of yourself all the time, you must have a very thick skin. There was that falling after choking on a pretzel. Then there was the Segway invident. Now, his latest blooper involved a bike, waving, and a police officer.

iPods going cheap

Just to let you know, I've been offered by a mate of mine the chance to buy 100 South African designed Ipods for $25 each (all above board) and wondered if any of you would be interested in one.

They're obviously a bit late for a Xmas present, but for the price you may as well get one.
They are a slightly different version of the Nano but still quite cool.

For all you techno geeks, the attached picture is the exact model on offer.

Let me know if you are interested so I can get organised.

Please don't take away my favourite soda

Now they are saying some fizzy drinks may cause cancer - and Fanta is one of them. They always do this. The price you pay for taking processed food I guess. But process food is also part of the advancement of society and technology. Part of moving towards the future.

 

People will eat more organic and natural food when they come down in price.

No reason to live?

Yesterday a man was accidentally trapped in a shredding machine and he ended up losing 3 or 4 limbs.

 

If I was this man and knew I'll lose my limbs, I wouldnt have cried for help and just allowed myself to bleed to death. Surely I'll know if my arms or legs are crushed beyond recognition.

 

With the current technology, there is no way of replacing these limbs with functional robotic alternatives. I wouldn't mind being Borg.

 

If they get amputated, I'll be a burden to all those around me and would rather die that be taxing.

 

These thoughts are my own and for myself and not for the man in the above article.

 

the walls are closing in... and what is that flushing sound

Been working on a project for the past few days, the nature of which is rather confidential, and could actually be all for nothing if a certain proposal isn't ratified...

So me and one of the other senior systems analyst have locked ourselves away from the day-to-day slog of the coal face, and basically attempt to emulate the lifestyle lived by hermits in that we've closeted ourselves away in the project room…



Amazing how much work you can achieve when there's no shoulder tapping, no phones ringing, no general conversations occurring to capture your attention for the briefest of moments (which we all know, add up to a hell of a lot of time at the end of the day when you take in to account not only the amount of time lost in paying attention to the conversation, and then the subsequent attempt at achieving the same level of concentration that you had previously devoted to the subject at hand prior to being disturbed/derailed)…

Just the furious tippity-tappity of touch-typing fingers rolling out SQL statements, contacting business users to gain a better understanding of what they're proposing be done to the system (conversations which go along the lines of "you want to do WHAT with the system? Why the h3ll do you want it to do that for?"), the scritchy-scratch noise of pen(cil) etching out notes/diagrams on A3 pieces of paper that is mapping out the ridiculous timeline that you are constrained to - all this interspersed with the exclamations of elation and/or sounds of utter anguish…

Oh, and the sounds of toilet(s) flushing… the project room that I'm cosseted away in, is beside the toilets - let me explain further, the toilets are only accessible from the foyer (ie. There's no door to access the toilets from inside our area)… it's amazing how many times the toilets are used in an hour (at it's busiest, I've counted 27 flushes in an hour - and there's only 50 people that work on this floor!)… true, there could be some that use the toilet without flushing, but I'd rather not have to count those ones - yes, I can also hear the sound of the toilet door closing and being locked/latched, as well as the clink of the toilet seat as the user raises/lowers it… and yes, much like Ally McBeal, our toilets are unisex… *sigh*

Spooked

Had my birthday recently and my loving wife conspired with my closest friends and my family to plan a surprise party. It was a nice surprise with plenty of scrumptious food and lots of laugh. The most fun we've had in a long time.

 

That night some of us went to a newish attraction up here in Auckland called Spookers. They have three attractions but we only went to two of them. The Spookers Haunted House and the Freaky Forest.

 

The Story goes... In 1998 the Government purchased all land surrounding a top secret research facility known as 'Compound K'. Government scientists were conducting secret experiments to find a cure for any possible nuclear contamination.

One evening, deep inside the compound, something went drastically wrong ... read the rest of the story here.

I thought the house was better than the forest. Althought the forest's Jason dude was quite believable. In the house, the best parts were: the psycho pipe guy, the guy in the cage who is obsessed with getting the keys, and the nurse with the eardrum-piercing scream. Freddy was good too although he is more funny than scary.

Over all it was an excellent spookers night.

Supermarket Humour

Maybe it's just me but I thought this was funny

I went to buy some taro a few days ago at Countdown.

This chick at the counter was processing my groceries until she got to the taro.

She asked "Is this Swede?"

I said "No. It is Taro."

She turns around to the supervisor and said "I do not know the code for Taro."

The supervisor yelled out and asked "Is it pink or white Taro?"

The cashier said "It's brown?!"

Hepi Balentayns Dey!

Ernie's Dream PC

I found Ernie's Dream PC. The release date (Japan Only) is 24th February.

http://tinyurl.com/cewtw

To boldly go where no one has gone before?

A Star Trek fan who spent thousands of dollars on converting his home in Britain into a replica of the Starship Enterprise has declared himself bankrupt.

Sci-fi enthusiast Tony Alleyne spent nine years transforming his flat into the bridge of Captain Kirk and crew's spaceship.

 

This is quite sad. I mean you spend your 9 yrs using all your money and what your passion ultimately brought you down in flames.

 

You can view the flat here.

 

The before and after photos are impressive. I don't think the actual set at are as detailed as Tony's flat.

It's not funny anymore

It all started with a Danish paper publishing what was suppose to be humour (theirs) depicting the Prophet Mohammad (I hope I spelt it correctly) as a suicide bomber. There were apparently several cartoons published.

 

This caused protests from the muslim community from different parts of the world which include Beirut, Syria, etc...A few days ago, 2 NZ papers (Dominion Post and The Press) and 2 TV channels (TV One and TV3) published/shown the cartoons as part of a news story. This caused protests on Sunday on Queen Street. Hundreds of local Muslims marched down Queen Street to protest against it's publication in NZ.

 

Personally I do not think there is anything wrong with this if the cartoons were shown as part of a news story telling people what happened overseas. Kinda like this..."This is what is happening overseas and it is caused by this cartoon... ". Now what is wrong with that? The media here in NZ did not have any malicious intent of blasphemy or insulting the local Muslim community. I think the local community over-reacted by claiming so.

 

The publishing of the cartoon was no different to the publishing of the Virgin Mary in a Condom a while back. Now that caused some protests from the local Catholic community but they did not protest against the media but against the artist who created it. Why can't the local Muslim community see it the same way? I do not know...

 

The arguments are that the media have the right to free speech - which is what it is all about in NZ. Free speech does not mean you can insult or defame people - this is true and it is certainly not the case here.

 

Overseas, the Muslim community have burnt Danish flags and even their embassies - to be honest, in doing so they are not helping themselves. They claim that Islam is peaceful - sure. Most religions claim they are peaceful. But if they are to go around protesting with placards with words "beheading..." or go on and burning other people's properties, that is hardly peaceful at all. At least the protest here in NZ is not voilent. That seems to be in keeping with the said peaceful Islam teachings.

 

Here is the latest (today's news) on the cartoon issue in NZ. Muslim countries are now threatening to cancel trade with NZ just because the media is doing their job. Very childish and misled I think they are.

 

 

Tamahori arrested for prostitution

New Zealand director Lee Tamahori has been arrested for prostitution.

The 55-year-old was picked up during a police prostitution sting on Hollywood's Santa Monica Boulevard on January 8.

Tamahori was arraigned in a Los Angeles court today and officially charged with soliciting.

Los Angeles Police Department spokesman Officer Jason Lee says the director was dressed as a woman, and approached an undercover policeman. He says he bailed himself two hours after his arrest and booking.

Lee Tamahori directed the New Zealand box office hit Once Were Warriors, and more recently the James Bond movie Die Another Day starring Pierce Brosnan and Halle Berry.

- NEWSTALK ZB
 

 

You can never tell.....

 

The most beautiful woman in the world

Aishwarya Rai was voted the most beautiful woman in the world.

Do you agree?

INDIAN CURRY RHAPSODY

Vital research has just found the little known Indian version of Queen's Bohemian Rhapsody!!

Naan, just killed a man

Poppadom against his head

Had lime pickle now he's dead.

Naan, dinner's just begun

But now I'm gonna throw it all away.

Naan, ooh, ooh Didn't mean to make you cry

If I'm not back from the loo by this time tomorrow

Curry on, curry on

Cause nothing really madras.

Too late, my dinner's gone

Sends shivers down my spine

Bottom aching all the time

Goodbye onion bhaji, I've got to go

Gotta leave you all behind and use the loo.

Naan, ooh, ooh

This dopiaza is so mild

I sometimes wish we'd never come here at all.

(guitar solo)

I see a little chicken tikka on the side

Rogan Josh, rogan josh, pass the chutney made of mango

Vindaloo does nicely very very

spicy

Meat!

 

Byriani (Byriani)

Byriani (Byriani)

Byriani and a naan

(A vindaloo loo loo loo)

I've eaten balti, somebody help me

He's eaten balti, get him to the lavatory

Stand you well back

'Case the loo is quarantined

here it comes

There it goes

Technicolor yawn

I chunder

No!

It's coming up again (There he goes)

I chunder, it's coming back again (There he goes)

Coming back again (up again)

here it comes again.

(No, no, no, no, no, no, NO)

On my knees, I'm on my knees

On his knees, oh there he goes

This vindaloo

Is about to wreck my guts

Poor meeee... poor meeee.... Poor MEEEEE!

(Guitar solo)

So you think you can chunder and then feel alright?

So you try to eat curry and

drink beer all night?

Oh maybe, but now you'll puke like a baby

Just had to come out

It just had to come right out in here.

(Guitar solo)

(slow bit)

korma or dopiaza

bhaji, naan or saag

Nothing makes a difference

Nothing makes a difference

To meeee....

 

Any way the wind blows.............shshshsh)

 

 

Cunningness Misplaced (Partie Deux)

Last week I posted Cunningness Misplaced" which is in a nutshell is about the police catchign red light runners on Nelson St just off the N'West M'Way. Well today they are at it again. This time there was no cop on the corner. Perhaps it didn't work quite well the last time so this time they've decided to hide. They posted stops about 100 metres in (which is the exact legal requirement - i.e. cops have to be visible for 100 metres if they were to set a trap. This rule may be old and obsolete since they seem to change the rules without really telling people). Good thing traffic is not as bad today.

 

For them to setup another trap like this which is quite dangerous and a nuisance on peak hour traffic, the revenue gathering must have gone really well. They can't wait to gather more revenue. I'm not sure how the financial year works for the Police but perhaps it ends in March/April and they are trying to catch up?

Panda Porn

A zoo in Thailand is planning to make Panda Porn thinking it would help their two pandas mate successfully - assuming that the Pandas are smart enough to understand videos. Next thing you'll hear, they are making Panda Viagara.

At the doctor's office

Posted on behalf of Godzilla...


A gorgeous young redhead goes into the doctor's office and said that her body hurt wherever she touched it.

"Impossible!" says the doctor. "Show me."

The redhead took her finger, pushed on her left breast and screamed, then she pushed her elbow and screamed in even more. She pushed her knee and screamed; likewise she pushed her ankle and screamed. Everywhere she touched made her scream.

The doctor said, "You're not really a redhead, are you?

"Well, no" she said, "I'm actually a blonde."

"I thought so," the doctor said. "Your finger is broken"

Do you have big testicles...dumbass?

This is an interesting study of testicle size in relation brain size.

Chuck Norris

Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting infers the probability of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.

To prove it isn't that big of a deal to beat cancer. Chuck Norris smoked 15 cartons of cigarettes a day for 2 years and acquired 7 different kinds of cancer only to rid them from his body by flexing for 30 minutes. Beat that, Lance Armstrong.

Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.

When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one.

When Chuck Norris sends in his taxes, he sends blank forms and includes only a picture of himself, crouched and ready to attack. Chuck Norris has not had to pay taxes ever.

Chuck Norris can touch MC Hammer.

Chuck Norris sleeps with a night light. Not because Chuck Norris is afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of Chuck Norris.

A Handicap parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Chuck Norris and that you will be handicapped if you park there.

Someone once tried to tell Chuck Norris that roundhouse kicks aren't the best way to kick someone. This has been recorded by historians as the worst mistake anyone has ever made.

Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his dad did.

Chuck Norris died ten years ago, but the Grim Reaper can't get up the courage to tell him.

At birth, Chuck Norris came out feet first so he could roundhouse kick the doctor in the face. Nobody delivers Chuck Norris but Chuck Norris.